Sidechicks, Sidedicks, and Social Media.

“There’s a thin line between doing too much and not enough and with social media today it’s not easy to stay on one side.”-Me, on my twitter

I never understood how a person could love someone after being hurt by them. After they cheated on them or were the one they cheated with. Isn’t a relationship supposed to be built on honesty and trust?

I mean I’ve never been the side piece but I definitely have been cheated on and lied to. I just don’t have it in me to be the other woman. I need all of someone not just a piece. I don’t have it in me to attempt to wreck a home even if the person tells me they love me.

If you loved me wouldn’t you be with me? If you really cared about me wouldn’t you introduce me to your friends? If we have a connection shouldn’t I be good enough to take home? Or more importantly why would you still be with your significant other if I’m really the person you want?

Anyone can end up a side piece. It’s not hard. Anyone can also quit being the side piece. We all have it in us. It only gets difficult when we believe that they love us. Once you find out about the other person and realize that they’re actually committed to them you should leave. Tell yourself that they weren’t the one and move on.

The issue is too often we let our low self esteem get the better of us and feel we’re undeserving of real love. We confuse social media attention “WCW/MCM” posts as an official relationship invitation. In reality that is not always the case. These social media acknowledgements without the right context can come off as just a friendly shout out.

You know.

“Heeeeey it’s MCM so I’d like to dedicate this one to my favorite person so and so”

That doesn’t sound a lot like love does it? Does that even sound like a relationship?

Now don’t get me wrong I’m not saying social media acknowledgement is required in a relationship. Actually I believe the opposite. I don’t think you need consistent social media acknowledgement at all. What I do believe you need is an understanding that social media plays a strong role in today’s relationships. That when men and women don’t see that there is someone in the picture they’ll assume that you’re single. If that assumption is there (and they have an interest in you) then they believe that any conversation they have with a person could be leading to a relationship.

GRANTED…

You can simply let a person know you’re in a relationship once you realize they’re flirting with you. However, wouldn’t it just be easier to show the person you love off every now and then? Who doesn’t love getting a cute little just because post from the love of their life on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook etc.? I for one do.

I have a friend who is very much in love with her girlfriend. You can see it in the way she regards her across all of her social media. It doesn’t come off forced or pushy. It doesn’t even come off with too much information and that’s really easy to do. My friend provides just enough information for you to know that there’s someone there. That she loves her and never wants to let her go.

While we might not all admit it that really is what everyone wants. We want someone to talk about us as if we are the only person in the world. We want to feel butterflies not just when we’re falling but when we’re caught. We want Katie or Kenny to know that we’re in love and there’s no way they could ever be our side piece.

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